Have you ever had a friend you've wronged? Have you ever said something innocently that was taken so wrongly someone cried? I have done both of these things and both still haunt me today.
I believe we have all likely said something innocently at one time or another only to have our comment taken insultingly. What happened to me started off as a wonderful day, in a new city while looking at a rental place. The older lady that showed us the house had her grand-daughter and grand-daughter's husband.
The grand-daughter and her husband were a young couple and out going. Through the conversation I off handily ask the grand-daughter, "When is the baby due?" The grand-daughter and her husband turned white and she started crying as she left the room.
I don't know if she cried because I spoiled a surprise to the grandmother or if she thought I was implying she looked fat. I won't say she looked fat but I will say she looked pregnant (Hench my thinking of pending delivery). As you can imaging we never heard back about that house after that.
Wronging a friend is the hardest to deal with emotionally for me. Friendships are bridges people like myself can't afford to burn. In this case I didn't so much burn it as badly destroy it, requiring time and energy to repair. I still have this person as a friend, thankfully, but I'm very much aware that the relationship we had will never be what it once was.
This friend invited me to their home state and treated me to a beautiful hotel close to the Atlantic Ocean, great food and wonderful conversation. What I did was ruined everything this friend tried to offer. I was ruined, moody and acted worse like I had a right to feel what I was feeling - even though I didn't!
My hope, prayer and wish for this friend is for us to someday to share time together again. I want so badly to show this friend that I'm not a selfish jerk, spoil brat, total ass who only things of himself. For now settling for a strained friendship is better then a total lost of that friendship.
I can live with the first example and have for over 20 years now but the second example haunts me daily.